My phone buzzed the other day. “Unknown caller-not in your contact list,” it said.

So, like a dummy, I picked up and got an earful. Of course, it was Ms. Pigette, the icon standing in the snow as she holds up a mailbox on Route 27.

“So what did you get for Christmas, a big bag of stupid pills? Or did you mean to insult your friends by not answering your phone?”

I told her sorry, I was away for the holidays and failed to answer my texts and messages.

“That figures, old man. Now, did you see the Bob Dylan flick? Come to think about it, weren’t you fooling around as a folk singer in 1965 when Dylan suddenly got famous and honked off his fans when he played the Newport Folk Festival backed by the powerhouse Butterfield Blues band? Or are you so old you don't or can't remember the 1960s?”

“To answer your first question, yes, I saw the Dylan movie. It is called 'A Complete Unknown.' I was going to pass on it, but the influential Boothbay Register arts editor, Lisa Kristoff, recommended it and, well, with her blessing, I couldn’t say no.”

“OK, OK, a big shout out to Lisa the K, so what did you think of the flick?”

I told her the movie was good, but it showed how much we all smoked cigarettes back then. Just think what it would cost today to smoke three packs of cigarettes a day. The movie opens with a judge scolding Pete Seeger as Un-American for defying a congressional committee. Ironically, the next day, I stopped at the U.S. Post Office and bought stamps honoring Seeger as a revered American icon.

Back to the movie, I got a chill down my spine when they showed an old TV news clip of President Jack Kennedy telling the nation the Russians were getting ready to install nukes in Cuba and we were on the brink of nuclear war. That was 63 years ago. Even today, that broadcast sends a chill down my spine.

“Well,” snorted Ms. P. "That is a happy thought. What else did you remember from the 1960s, if anything?”

“OK, Miss Nosybody, I still have fond memories of the summer of 1965. I recall playing folk tunes at the old Rendezvous on Southport, drinking homemade beer after the show at Dick Dill’s barn, and spending the night in the girls dorm at the old Newagen Inn. And I remember riding a motorcycle. Other memories are pleasant but very, very, private.”

“Quit bragging Grandpa,” she said.

"So tell me, what did the Old Scribbler think of the first week of the new/old president?”

I thought for a moment. “He makes a lot of noise, stirring up the national press and the left-wingers, but it is too soon to know if it will make much difference. For instance, he questioned the work FEMA did in Los Angeles, but he is the guy in charge of FEMA. It is his problem now.”

I told her it did bother me when he gave a "Get out of Jail Free Card” to the 1,500 rioters who smashed into the Capitol, ransacked offices, and desecrated and defecated in the building. In my book, all those rioters who battled and beat up cops should go to jail after, and only after, they were released from the hospital. I am not alone in this thought. More than a few cops, including The National Fraternal Order of Police and the International Association of Chiefs of Police group, also criticized POTUS 47. The Capitol and Metro DC police deserve medals (and a big fat raise) for not pulling their weapons. Their professionalism avoided a historic bloodbath. I remember what happened in 1970 when the Ohio National Guard opened fire on college kids protesting the Vietnam War. Nuff said.

“OK, OK, enough, you Old Doofus. Thanks for the history lesson. Now I have a question. Why should we invade Greenland? Is it a part of their environmental plans? Do they want to break off some of their glaciers and tow them into the Gulf of Maine? This could cool the warm waters and encourage the lobsters and cod back to our shores. Have you heard of this idea?”

“No Ms. P., that one is bull. A little, no a lot, strange,” I answered. “Maybe, it should be filed alongside the promise to build the border wall and get Mexico to pay for it, his campaign pledge to immediately lower the price of groceries, and his brag to declare peace in Ukraine, all in his first week on the job. When you say this kind of stuff, some folks might think it is true.”

Ms. P let out another snort and snapped out a nasty but often-used word. "You are so full of it," she added. 

And the line went dead.