Well, kiddies, did you watch the great vice presidential debate?

Who won? Was it JD, the best-looking veep candidate since J. Danforth Quayle? Or your rumpled old Uncle Timmy, the friendly guy who reminded you of a retired high school principal?

The answer is — drum roll — who cares? Nobody. The Veep is a spare for use in an emergency.

In case you haven’t noticed, this is a political season like none other. The old rules and maxims don’t matter. For instance, the MAGA-GOP gang now embraces tariffs, a thought that would have been anathema to Republicans in the years after World War II. 

Or how about a hand-picked Democratic claque cheering for the Cheneys, Liz and Dick? Could you even imagine Sen. Bernie Sanders and Dick Cheney rooting for the same team?

In this supercharged news environment, the VP debate was not only yesterday’s news it was last year’s news — like the scandal over Hunter Biden’s laptop or how, in 1968, Grandpa Don dodged the Vietnam draft. Old news, all.
But last week, we saw an avalanche of events overcome everything else.

We saw Mother Nature flood a scenic mountain region. Who thought you might need flood insurance in the North Carolina hill country?

And, who thought the guy we pictured as a doddering old Dude who many thought no longer had the marbles to possess the family car keys would act decisively in the face of a natural disaster while working the phone to avert a major war in the Middle East?

Grandpa Joe multitasking? Never happen. Right? Wrong-o-mundo, Grasshopper.

Despite Grandpa Don's claims to the contrary, Grandpa Joe did call the Georgia governor (and others) to offer federal assistance.

Here is what the AP reported from Georgia Gov. Brian Kemp’s press conference on Sept. 30.

"The president just called me yesterday afternoon. I missed him and called him right back. And he just said, ‘Hey, what do you need?’ And I told him, ‘You know, we got what we need, we will work through the federal process.’ He offered that if there's other things we need, just to call him directly, which, I appreciate that." 

Then Grandpa Joe sent 1,000 troopers from Fort Bragg (er, Fort Liberty) and a flotilla of helicopters and gear to the disaster scene.

Meanwhile, halfway around the world, both Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and Hamas honcho Yahya Sinwar ignored efforts by the U.S. and the Arab world to broker a ceasefire in a mess that has killed thousands of civilians.

Then Israel focused on Lebanon-based Hezbollah and its patron, Iran. Next, Iran sent a couple hundred missiles into the Jewish state. 

Thanks to the anti-missile technology, much supplied by Uncle Sam, few of the 200 missiles made it to Earth.

Meanwhile, the White House is burning up the phones/computers. The White House acknowledges Israel has the right to hit back, but suggests an attempt to whack the Iranian nuclear program and bomb Iran’s oil production capacity would be unproductive.

First, the Iran nuke program is hidden away under a mountain, protected from most air strikes. Even the thought of an attack on Iran’s oil production hiked the price on the world oil market.

What does that mean for us?

Last week, in Boothbay Harbor you could buy gas at $2.94 a gallon one day. Almost overnight, the price jumped to $2.99. Look for it to go higher. By the way, a year ago the average gas price was $3.77, says AAA.

Union dock workers threatened to send the economy into a tizzy by going on strike on the East and Gulf coasts. It was short-lived as the White House worked to ease an early settlement.  

Meanwhile, as the world frets, the political candidates are just going on like nothing has happened, complaining of this and that and blaming it all on the other side.

And, if you believe the polls (and I am not sure of them at all)  the presidential race is in a statistical dead heat.

Pollsters used to rely on phone surveys, but today, seven out of 10 Americans have cut their landline. Besides, would you spend 15 minutes answering a pollster? Or just hang up.

Today, lots of folks are independents. Where will they go? Could there be a hidden shift favoring the Republicans or the Democrats? 

Early voting has begun. Here in Maine, the official early in-person voting began on Monday, Oct. 7. But 104 municipalities, including Boothbay and Boothbay Harbor, jumped the gun by mailing absentee ballots to voters who requested the same. 

So far, says the Maine Secretary of State, 586 Democrats, 329 Republicans, and 260 unenrolled voters have already voted.

What does this all mean? Nobody, but NoooBooody, knows the future, not even the Old Scribbler.

And, to tell the truth, if he did, he would hop on the next plane for Las Vegas.