It’s a good thing the weather gods in our neighborhood have been considerate of late because the last rain we had motivated me to repair a big section of roof that I have put off for too long. It became painfully obvious to me that when we had discolored rainwater flowing from a dining room ceiling light, my time had come.

The next day the weather cleared, I began to tear off a large section of roof over the bedroom once occupied by our youngest daughter. The room is no longer lived in but that didn’t mean that it was a good time to let the rain come in. After all, I had patched the roof endlessly with a variety of leak-stopping materials including the infamous, all but indestructible “Grace Ice and Water” shield. This material, however magnificent as a sealing underlayment, can be one hell of a pain to put down, especially working along, in the wind, with little or no experience. I, magnificent carpenter Bob, wasted an entire half roll of “Ice and Water” on one of my first attempts to apply. It got stuck on itself, on my pants, on my hands then gloves  — in point of fact, it got stuck on everything but the roof! I was a proud warrior! What a mess.

Well, my best friend I & W was also applied to the roof above the bedroom that leaked along with roofing cement, mobile home roll roofing, and last but not least half a five-gallon can of some sort of magic serum that was guaranteed to seal an atomic submarine at 40 fathoms! And yes, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, all these brilliant applications had to be ripped off before I could once again apply my good friend, Ice and Water shield prior to installing new bundles of asphalt shingles.

Now I know there are carpenters, roofers and ordinary citizens who are picking themselves up off the floor, doubled over in hysterics, because anyone who has ever installed a new roof, or watched one being installed, knows that this is not a task for the faint of heart. This, my friends, is the work of fine art, excessive skill and back-breaking long days. None of which I even remotely represent. But nonetheless I dove in and continue to be diving in as we speak. This is why I am so grateful for rainless days, even though I know in my heart of hearts, that we need the rain desperately! What a good crew of roofers can do in a day takes me a week.

There are three good things, I must add, that I have realized as I spend time atop our house with WBLM blaring and our lovely best Labradoodle friend, Leica, howling as I drop bundles while Led Zeppelin rattles the neighbors' windows. Jean Thompson would have called the police by now! The three things are: 1) better phone reception 2) a wonderful view (see above) and 3) the knowledge that the mess I’ve made on the ground killed all the ragweed.

I rest my case.